As many of you know, I host a hashtag day each week called #tellthetruththursday Yesterday I spoke about a topic close to my heart. I have been wanting to write a blog post about it for ages. What topic you ask? Sensitivity. Yes, I am sensitive. I am thin skinned and I wear my heart on my sleeve! So much so that I even designed a sweater with hearts literally on the sleeves and is embroidered with “Where do you where YOUR heart?”
It seems that I am not the only one who hears on a regular basis “Why do you have to be so sensitive?” or “Don’t be so sensitive” or the worst “I wish you weren’t so sensitive”? And it is most upsetting when these comments come from those close to me. But I am who I am. I’ve always been me and as long as I’m alive I will always be me. I can’t be anyone else! As you know by now my purpose is to spread LOVE in this world. So having a sensitive soul helps me do that!
When I hear people say that the world has gone to heck in a hand basket and needs more love, well, according to this quote maybe the world could use some more sensitive souls!
Are you sensitive too? Don’t be ashamed of who you are! It’s ok to be sensitive. In fact it’s more than ok. Research has shown that sensitive people are empathetic, observant, creative and caring people. It is just that for too long sensitive people are portrayed in the media as weak and bullied.
I shared a story on Snapchat (username blissbakery) about one time in particular that my sensitivity became the fodder of others. I was literally the butt of the jokes an entire evening out with “friends”. It was nearly 30 years ago, and they have probably long forgotten about it but I haven’t.
Arriving home one day with my son in the car, we pulled into our long driveway. In an instant the happy mood, bopping along to music, turned into a nightmare. The most horrible thing happened. I accidentally ran over our family cat Midnight. I swear I still have post traumatic stress over it. And it is hard for me to even type this. But after it happened I screamed at the top of my lungs, jumped out of the car and ran around to the side. I realized instantly when I saw Midnight the reality and things suddenly became a blur. I called for my then husband to come help. Sadly there was nothing we could do to save Midnight. I was overwhelmed with guilt even though it was an accident. I was filled with grief for the loss of this special member of our family. My ex had one thing on his mind, we had a dinner engagement with some of his college fraternity brothers and their wives and we had to hit the road.
I was in no shape to go anywhere but what I felt didn’t matter. I cried all the way in the car as he drove. And when we arrived to the restaurant and sat down, everyone lifted their drinks and offered a rousing toast, “to the CAT KILLER” clink, clink! All I could do was cry. I heard a few “Why do you have to be so sensitive” comments. Some other jokes got thrown around like what was the menu of the day? “Road KILL” of course, oh and that the house specialty “Fried Cat” was so good. They were all laughing it up and I wanted to run and hide.
This is the thing, the world is made up of all types. Those who are sensitive are some of those. Those who lack the “sensitivity chip” are others. Polar opposites. I seem to have the opposites thrust into my life at various stages and no matter how much they berate me or tease me or try to change me, I don’t toughen up. I am proud to wear my heart on my sleeve. It isn’t always easy. But this is the way God made me. I don’t try to change others so I appreciate it when others accept me.
I ran across a great quote the other day that helped me see my sensitivity in a new way. As if it is a superpower. My sensitivity allows me to love more passionately, connect more deeply, tap into my creativity more freely and to be more empathetic. Which is why I seem drawn to kids, senior citizens, animals and those in need. Just because I am sensitive doesn’t mean I don’t like to laugh or joke. I actually LOVE to laugh. Just not at the expense of others’ feelings. And I’ve noticed that often people like to make fun of others who are vulnerable because they are “easy targets”. I think that is mean. It is a form of bullying, which I don’t support. I don’t like conflict. I don’t like to fight back. But I do like peace and harmony.
I’ve shared on here before my concern about an underlying issue in society with regard to contempt. Basically, contempt is disrespect combined with disgust. Often, teasing is tinged with contempt. Which is hurtful. So I hope people will think long and hard about how they treat others. I hope people ditch this need to dismiss sensitive people or try to beat them down with the intent to thicken their skin. Thank God even after the many times I have had to deal with that myself I have stayed true to who I am. I may not be tough, but I AM a badass. An empathetic badass!